IT'S NOT ADD

Cooper came home from school yesterday, immediately told me he was on red. That's code for "I got into trouble". In his class, as in many elementary classrooms, there is a behavior system in place. Green=good, yellow=made a few bad choices, red=really bad, or many bad choices. In his room his teacher sends home a report for each kid daily. I love the idea. It's on a monthly calendar and the kids have to color in the circle for that date with the color they were on at the end of the day. Accountability... great. Cooper had been on yellow and red for things like, "put foot on hand rail while doing down stairs" or "took longer route to put up coat in hallway, to play with another child" I'm thinking, why are we sweating the little stuff. This is a first grade classroom doesn't this happen a lot with everyone? I let it go. I trust the teacher's judgement, and initial every day. Yesterday Cooper was on red for a real reason, "talking while the teacher was talking".

Later in the day, out of no where, he says, "Mom I have a lot more writing on my chart than everyone else." "yeah Cooper"... Long pause. "does that mean I"m bad?" I wanted to say, "no it means your making bad choices." but I just said, "No". HOnestly I think he's been making normal 7 year old choices and getting a rap sheet for it. Now he's got nothing left to lose so why not make choices that really are bad. Not to mention he now has poor judgment in deciding what truly are bad choices. I'm a little pissy about it honestly. He has such a negative self image at this point, and why? Because his teacher wants to document instances he feels demonstrate ADD tendancies, when It's been proven the kid doesn't have ADD by a medical professional? What a load of bullshit. He's 7. He deserves the best possible environment in which to learn. Not to be bulldozed because his teacher wants to prove me wrong.

I AM NOT MEDICATING MY SON SO HIS TEACHER CAN HAVE A CLASSROOM OF 7 YEAR OLD ZOMBIES! 30% of 1st grade boys are put on medication and 90% of those recommendations come from teachers. TEACHERS ARE NOT DOCTOR'S. TEACHERS DO NOT HAVE THE PROFESSIONAL BACKGROUND TO QUALIFY THEM TO DIAGNOSE THEIR STUDENTS. I AM A TEACHER FOR GOD SAKES. Teach students based on their learning style, and in a way appropriate for their developmental needs. A 7 year old has at MOST a 7 minute attention span, the need to be up and about, and the need to socialize. DO NOT SIT THEM AT DESKS AND ASK THEM TO DO WORKSHEETS QUIETLY, and then PUnish them for talking and diagnose them with ADD because they can't "pay attention". THAT IS DEVELOPMENTALLY INAPPROPRIATE! THAT IS EDUCATIONAL MALPRACTICE!

**Reading this 5 years later I can still say, "right on to me". Cooper is 11 and still super mellow. This teacher ended up getting "re-assigned" to "school counselor" after much advocating on my part. It helped immensely that I got many parents, who were feeling the same way, to speak up. During his time with this teacher Cooper lost nearly 8 months of learning, his dibels decreased, his AR score decreased, it truly was educational malpractice (I had to keep all these scores in order to prove it, so hang on to everything you get from school). He went from being considered gifted, to being BELOW grade level (based on test scores). It took me until this school year to catch him back up. He now reads 3 grade levels above his own, and tested "advanced proficient" on 2 of three categories on the state test. This entry should be an warning and an inspiration to other parents. Do your own homework. We should know our children the best, and know how to advocate for them.**

beautiful Boy

It's nice to take in a low mileage week. It gives me time to focus on other stuff. Had cooper's P/T conference. His teacher insists, despite a Doctor's evaluation, that Cooper has ADD! The kid has the activity level of a premo athlete! Go figure. He's not distractable, he's bored, and doesn't want to sit still. He's seven, His parents were both D1 athletes, and he's very smart. challenge him, let him move about. It seems to me to be educational malpractice to ask 7 year olds to sit in their seats for 6 hours a day. It's not developmentally appropriate! I have watched his self esteem deflate over this school year. It's been extremely difficult to watch. I don't really know what to do. I'm probably going to ask for a different teacher. One that's willing to be flexible for their students. This teacher has had one discipline problem after another with his entire class. I think it can be assumed that he is not meeting the needs of his students, and from cooper's deflation, I think I can also assume he's blaming the kids. It's all too common now for teacher to toss aside their own accountability for an misdiagnosis of ADD. I've seen it myself as a teacher. This is going to take some finess... Something I don't have. Good luck to me... More luck to Cooper.

Gasparilla 15k

Finally. I broke the tape and it was actually tape, not yarn. The race itself was one that tested my ability to focus and overcome. I didn't feel awesome smooth like I did at Westchester. This one was all guts for the last three miles. As Casey said, "you look awfully bad for a 56:00". He's right, but I'll take it. My biggest win on the roads to date.

"Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose." Instead of this being a head inflating experience it was a cathartic one. This win forced me to face my abilities, their possible limits, and the head games I play with myself. No more excuses, no more holding back. I am now ready to lay it out there. Naked. I'm not afraid to find out I might be wrong about what I think I can do, or what others think I can do. I don't care. The only way I'll ever know is if I pick up my damned skirt and go for it. If this win had gone down with Annie on a throne I'd have just mulled on waiting for the other foot to drop. Since this win was challenged by the local press (and the comments were brutal) it forced me to take a long hard objective look at my running, and life over the last 4 years and draw a conclusion. The conclusion being this. First and foremost, people are cruel and weird (anything to make a story out of nothing). Secondly, I don't train hard enough. I don't race often enough. I hold out just enough to be able to say, "if I actually trained I could...." because I'm afraid to know the truth. My times for what has been put in to them are awesome and shameful simultaneously. I may be a national class runner forever. I don't care. It's about the training. I am surrenduring myself to it fully to see what's in there, no more wasting time and talent because of elementary hang ups and inhibitions. It's business now. I've been striped naked there's nothin' left to lose.

After thought, Do I race as Annie Cooper-Gasway or Just Annie GAsway.